ATTENTION ALL GOOGLERS LOOKING FOR FANTANAS HALLOWEEN COSTUMES!
READ THIS HUGE YELLOW BOX!
Hi, I'm Marcus. I'm sorry, but regardless of what Google led you to believe, I do not sell Fantanas costumes.
If want to buy a set of Fantanas costumes, check out Wicked-Chamber.com. The same costumes are also available at FrightCatalog.com I have no affiliation whatsoever to either of these sites! I am just passing on their links as a courtesy to you, the Googling public.
If you are the proprietor of a costume shop that sells/rents Fantanas costumes, feel free to post your URL below and I will add your link to this box so that you may cash in on my high Google ranking for "Fantanas Halloween Costumes."
And as always, if you and your hot friends find any of the information on this page to be useful in your quest to dress as the Fantanas this Halloween, email me some pictures of you in your fruit flavored gear and I'll post them.
-- Marcus - October 10, 2005
You know those new Fanta commercials, with the four jet-ski riding megababes in fruit flavored hotpants?
(Alright, I'll pause here for you to make your obligatory, "God, I hate those commercials!" remarks. Bunch a lying wusses...)
I'd say about 95% of all advertising rolls off my back, extracting nothing more than some cynical remark about how stupid American consumers are, and how easily they are manipulated into buying the Man's SUVs or diapers or cheeseburgers.
Well, as the World's Last Spice Girls FanTM, I have to admit that this sassy faux-Latina pitch for low-grade fruit flavored soda totally worked on me. Although I have resisted the temptation to actually buya Fanta, I do in fact wanta Fanta. And that, I suppose, is half the battle.
In my inevitable web search for more info on The Fantanas, I discovered this!
What in the name of high fructose corn syrup is this?! An alternate set of Fantanas?! Inconceivable! Then I noticed the copyright date: 2002!
Apparently Coca-Cola has burned through a full set of Fantanas in only two short years! As the World's Last Spice Girls FanTM, it really hits home for me when a team of sugar-water hawking sexpots vanishes without a trace.
The situation is only made more troubling by the fact that the 2002 Fantanas are more attractive than their replacements. Why would Coca-Cola fix what ain't broke? Is something sinister afoot on Fantana Island?
What ever happened to the original Fantanas? Where are they now? I hope they've been promoted, and are now readying themselves for a relaunch as The SURGEsations.